Be you, Bravely

Postman comes.

You know the colour of that envelope.

You know texture of it before you even pick it up.

You know the colour of the paper inside.

You know the font.

You know the feel of the paper.

You know the post mark.

You know what it is going to say

You know you have been waiting so long

for this piece of paper

but

You still feel scared.

The brave face slips

the feeling of limbo now feels like lead

Routed to a time

a date

a place

An unplanned route to a destination you know so well

You look at yourself in the mirror

You breathe

You cry

You look at yourself in the mirror again

at your face,

that face broken by surgery.

You cry

You wail

You breathe

You breathe again

You look deep into your eyes and then

You stop

You close you eyes

and

Your breathing relaxes

Those breaths get deeper

You smile

You smile at how far you have come

And those breaths

Those breaths turn into a sighs of relief.

Relief that it's happening

Relief that the pain is nearly over.

Relief that you are still brave

Relief that you are still you

And you smile

You smile and look back at yourself

and you say

'Be you, Bravely'

Because

that is all you can ever be

#braintumourawareness #braintumour #meningioma #crainiotomy #crainiectomy #survivor #neurosurgery #benignisnotfine